Light Bulbs

The following is a true story...no names have been changed cuz it happened to me....

Picture this...I had been up since 3 AM, having only had about 3 hours of sleep the night prior due to moving, (more on that later) worked a 9 1/2 hour shift , drove home and immediately started unpacking my car (I drove to work with a car full of random Kitchen supplies) and continued to repack my car and move all of the remaining items that needed to be on the moving truck from the office to the living room so Ed and the one man "crew" (more on that later, too) could come in and do a grab and load.  The time was now 8PM and I was beyond exhausted, needed a shower and had not eaten in 24 hours. I had just driven Ed to the old house to pick up his car, and the following conversation happened:

ME: What now?

ED: Well, we need food and also a trip to WalMart is needed. We need a shower curtain, light bulbs, a lamp (He broke the one I had in the move) and stuff to shower with. 

ME: You go get food, I will go to Wal Mart and meet you back at the house

ED: Are you sure you are ok to go on your own?

ME:  

ED: ok. Love you. See you in a few. 

I then headed off to Walmart. I walked around the store gathering up the needed shower supplies, and shower curtain. I was then near the back of the store where the lights bulbs are, so I figured I would grab some. By this time, the only thing holding me upright was the cart I was pushing. I was SO tired. Anyway...I turn the corner onto the light bulb aisle and I am faced with 4800 different types of light bulbs. I stand there. Staring at the bulbs.

MY BRAIN: YOU CAN'T DO THIS!!! YOU AREN'T STRONG ENOUGH!!! IT'S TOO MUCH!!!

ME: I can't do this. It's too much.

Just then (about 10 seconds had passed, but I thought I had been there 4 days) Mr. WalMart Lightbulb Man came around the corner. Actual Conversation:

MR. WALMART: Can I help you?

ME: Yes, Mr. WalMart Lightbulb Man. I have to get the light bulbs so I can go home, have a shower and some food and lay down. I can't do any of those things until I get the light bulbs. Since I don't want to lose my shit in the light bulb aisle at WalMart and become an Internet meme, I need you to just give me the light bulbs. There are too many and I can't do this. It is too much. 

MR W: *without breaking eye contact reaches over and places a pack of bulbs in my cart* There you go. 

ME: Thank You. I really didn't want to lose my shit in the light bulb aisle at WalMart. 

MR W.: Nobody wants that. 

ME: Have a good night.

Then I walk off and go back to the front of the store, grab a lamp, and as I am walking, there is a display with soft, fuzzy lap blankets. I pick up a very pretty purple one and say out loud to no one : I NEED DIS" put it in my cart and proceed to the check out feeling SO victorious. Like I just won the Olympics, cuz I had the light bulbs. 

I get home, Ed comes out to help me bring the items in cuz he's good like that and he happens to carry the lamp in. He brings it in, and says " Oh, look. Light bulbs are included. We didn't need them after all"

I threw my shoe at him, called him an asshole, ate my burger, showered and laid down with my new purple blanket.. 

A Reader?

It seems as though there is one person reading my blog!! I am equally oddly excited and puzzled by this. Why one? Why me? Who is it? Do they know me? Do I know them? Why am I so inquisitive? Why did I just use an obnoxious word like "inquisitive"? Do I want to appear smart to my reader?

I guess I have always been the kind of person who wants to know why. Just a curious mind, I suppose. So, if you are reading this, dear reader, please leave a comment and let me know how you happened upon my little blog thingy and how do you like it so far? Would you like me to post more often? Did you find it and read it by accident? If a bus leaves Cleveland at 10 AM with.....oops. never mind

A Random Conversation with my Hubby

So, The following took place a couple weeks ago:

Me and Ed were watching TV and a commercial came on for some cell phone company. They showed a cartoon like picture of a text chain between people who used the head emoji things and instead of typing, they talked. Anyway, one of them was a dinosaur head. Here's what happened next:

ME: I want to be a dinosaur (what I meant to say was " I want the dinosaur head on my phone", but apparently my brain and mouth don't communicate)

ED: What?

ME (Realizing it was too late to correct myself and wondering how this would play out) You heard me. I want to be a dinosaur.

ED: Um. Ok?

ME: well, maybe not. Cuz if I was a dinosaur, I would have to eat you and that might make me sad. And possibly ill. I've seen what you eat....

ED: You wouldn't HAVE to eat me, you know.

Me: Ummm...yes. I would

ED: No you wouldn't. You could be an herbivore.

ME: WHAT??? No way!!! If I'm a dinosaur, I'm a T-REX

ED: well, when I modify your DNA, I will make you a Brontosaurus and you will eat trees and shrubs and things

ME: First of all...how are you going to modify my DNA?? It isn't like you have a kit or anything.

ED: I will buy one from Amazon. They have them. And I already sit in the truck stops and modify DNA anyway.

ME: Ok, so you look at me and see a great big ass and a long skinny neck with a tiny head??? JERK!!
Why you gotta squash my dreams of being a T REX??

Ed: I don't wanna get eaten.

And with that I was mad at him for 2 days. SO selfish.

Quietness

It occurs to me that since the kids have all moved out and have lives of their own (who knew???) and my shift has changed so that I no longer call Beckatang on my ride home (sadness) my life has become....quiet. Not really boring...just quiet.

Ed is away more now than ever before, and I spend an inordinate amount of time talking to the dogs. Don't worry, they don't talk back...yet


I do have a few characters at work. There's Mamma Shark. She's pretty cool. We spend a bit of time laughing every day. She had a really good boob day today. I told her so. She was happy.

Then there's Gina Marie. She is one of those "quiet, nice" girls who really isn't so nice. She comes up to my desk and says things that make me laugh out loud. She has a low tolerance for stupid people and isn't afraid to tell me when stupid is running rampant.

Kung Pao. Oh beloved Kung Pao. We kind of share a brain. At any given time, we actually finish each other's sentences...and usually that ain't good.

And when I think about it, quiet isn't really bad. It is just....different.

I guess I felt like I was supposed to be "on" all the time and forgot that it's OK to have a nice, quiet day that really has nothing going on in it but work , home, family feud and bedtime. I think I was worried that I wouldn't be interesting or entertaining, but really, no one is reading this but me, so fuck it. I will write when I feel like it and about whatever is going on.

Maybe someday after I am long gone, someone will find this and I will live on...what a maudlin thought....ugh.

BTW, Mamma Shark has another good boob day.(it is now 2 days later)  She better. She paid enough for them.....

The Collective

So, in my last post, I mentioned 'The Collective". This is the name that Ed has given to myself and my sisters when we are all together. Let me tell you a bit bout the members of the "collective".

In order of age (oldest to youngest)

Sue- Sister Sue is the oldest member of the collective. She is not, however, the wisest. Although she would have you think so... She is pretty good at making people believe she knows what she is talking about, so she does have that particular set of skills.

Mary-  Crazy Sister Mary. Her name says is all. She's crazy. But the good kind of crazy. Like the "I'm pretty mellow until you mess with my kids, grand kids, sisters or brothers" kind of crazy. She also spends an inordinate amount of time cleaning things. Not sure why.

Brenda- Me. You already know more about me than you probably want or need to.

Melissa- Mel Mel, Mellio, Missquisha She is the "crafty" one. She can make some pretty cool stuff, but she can also come up with a pretty devious plan if needed. Keep an eye on her. She's tricky

Rebecca- Beckatang. That's all I'm gonna say.

When Ed coined the phrase "The Collective" he also informed me that there are a couple of "rules" that must be followed when dealing with the Collective

1.   Never look the collective directly in the eyes. It's like Medusa, only with sarcasm

2. Always have chocolate nearby when the collective is getting together.

3. Whatever you do, NEVER take the side of one member of the collective against another member. The one whose side you have taken will turn on you faster than a fat kid at a bake shop. Then the ENTIRE Collective will chew you up and spit you out.

4. Always agree with whatever the Collective says, does or wants. Even if it is illegal. And sometimes the line is pushed...or crossed....or erased.

When I reminded my dear husband that I was a member of the collective, he said "Oh, I am aware". And then he gave me some chocolate and walked away.


Good man.

Hello... it's Me again

Hey there!

Well. So. It has been like 9 years since my last post. Damn! I do gotta say that a LOT has changed.

First off, Ed and myself have moved (2  times actually) and no longer have the house we were working so hard to renovate. It was kind of sad, but actually now I see it was not all a bad thing. We are in a real cute little place now, still on the Tundra. But we are renting and I gotta say, overall, life don't suck. It did for a bit, but it got better.

Bug is no longer with Nitoe. That ended a while back. She is now with Princess J. Princess J is wonderful. She is pretty and smart and I really like her. That is why she is Princess J and not troll girl J. Actually I have been accused of liking her more than I like Bug. EH. What are ya going to do?

Princess Shell is still in Vancouver, how ever, she no longer works at Shell. She works at a college. So I guess I will call her...Professor Shell. Even though she does not teach, and isn't affiliated with Shell in any way. It's MY blog thingy and I will do what I want! She has a love interest that I shall call.....Turtle. She's kind of in a shell...kind of shy. But not at ALL green.

Ratt Chuck is now Mrs. Ratt Chuck and is also a Mommy. Yup She has a little Mouse. I love Mouse. She is a real cutie. Can't say the same for the Mr. But more on that later...

Twitch is now in Arizona and working. He has been on his own for some time now and is doing quite well. All good things

Anthostein is now in San Diego. He is with a wonderful girl who I will call Submariner, because she is in the Navy. He is still cooking and looks a lot like a Viking. All tall and hairy

Ed is now the proud owner of a CDL. He is also a bona fide trucker. I guess that makes me a truckers wife. Hmmm...interesting. ANYWAY...he works for a company that hauls for Amazon. You know, the people who are taking over the world one palette of Cheetos at a time??? He really enjoys it and I am glad. He is usually only gone overnight and once in a while 2 nights, but not much more than that.

As for me....well...I went to school for MA and X Ray Tech and after school, no one would hire me cuz I didn't have experience, which I couldn't get cuz no one would hire me...such a frustrating time. But it did lead me to my current job of the past almost 7 years. It's not a bad gig (believe me, there are worse...not sure what, but there must be somethin) and I am a team lead, so there is THAT. Also, Bug works there too. We recently started working in sort of the same department. Kind of different parts of the same department. I will be introducing you to my work friends over time...

Freakin and Pufferfish are no longer together. He is now living in the great frozen North (I just made that up) I miss him. We still connect via the Facebooks.

Beckatang has an amazing daughter who I shall call Chicken Lips. Chicken Lips is 6 going on 47. She really is. Beckatang has her hands FULL with that girl. (The Tang is a Mrs. too, BTW, and her hubby is Brian (not his real name but one given to him by the collective) )

Did I ever mention the collective? Let me know. I will elaborate if not.

Speaking of the Facebooks (I did earlier, if you were paying any sort of attention. ) , it brings me to my next thought...are people still reading blogs? Have we become a society of Vlogs? I sure hope not. I enjoy the written (or in this case, typed ) word and hope I can still entertain a couple people. Or at the very least leave a bit of humor for generations to come...

So , if you are reading this (and maybe read through a few of my earlier posts) then leave a comment and let me know if I should continue or is it a waste of my time. Not that I am going to let anyone else decide if I continue, but I am a curious thing and would love to hear from others.

Back after a LOOOONG abscence!!!

Hello everyone! It has been a VERY long time since my last post and there have been quite a few changes here on the Tundra. SOOOOO........here goes!

My darling husband Ed has retired from the USAF . That's right, after 29 years, he is a civilian. His retirement ceremony was nice, and I got 2 dozen long stemmed yellow roses, and a very nice letter in a leather binder. He now works for DCMA. That's Defense Contract Management Agency...yup the guvment.

Rattchuk is now a US Marine. She has gone thru boot camp and is now at her MOS school in Ft. Lee, VA. She is due home on Dec. 9, and is still afraid of squirrels..more on that later

Princess Shell has moved to Vancouver,WA to follow a career opportunity. She has been given a job in the anamaie (spelling?) industry. But for now, while she gets the schooling/training necessary, she is working at....wait for it.......Shell! That's right! She is working at a station a few blocks from her apartment! Life is strange! Oh, and she went there without Sassafras...they are currently "working on it" whatever the hell THAT means....

Anthostein has moved back into the Tundra. He is living with some friends and sharing living expenses, so he is currently doing any and all orders the Army can give him. He has 2 sets of 10 day orders coming up and then hopefully after that 90 day orders...school is on the back burner for now due to transportation issues.....AND he is now dating a wonderful little girl (really, she is small) named Lizard. I like her. She has spunk....

The lebanese are still together. Bug is currently unemployed and Nitoe is currently pregnant with twins again. She is doing the surrogacy thing again. And making cakes.

Twitch lives with the lebanese and works at Del Taco.

Freakin and his bride, Pufferfish and little Mia are all in Goose Creek, SC. They are there cuz Freakin is a seaman..or sea warrior...or sea biscuit....whatever. He's in the Navy. Anyway, he is in training there and they have all gone. It makes me sad, so we won't talk of it right now. They are all good .

As for me...well...Hilton closed it's doors and I am unemployed...sorta. Blackstone decided that a bunch of Phillipinos could do our jobs better than us, and they sent our jobs there. So, I have been making cakes, and cupcakes for a living. Well, sorta...I mean, I'm not really making a LOT of money at it and it isn't exactly steady, but I'm trying. I have made a couple of pretty nice cakes though...and the last order I did for Veteran's Day has the potential to turn into something big....so we shall see....In the meantime, I am waiting to hear about school opportunities thru TRA and also Ed is gonna look into a VA grant or loan for a commercial kitchen for me...More to come as that develops....

Shila the wonder dog is still.....wonderous!

That is all




Beckatang

Me Again!

Hey Everybody! I was just dinkin around on the old interwebs and decided to post as little blog. So here goes:

Bug wrecked her Montero and now has a Chevy Silverado to take it's place. (No one was hurt). Nitoe has started college classes and soon we will call her Dr. Nitoe,PHD. Lu is growing like crazy and Twitch is now employed at Del Taco in San Jaghetto

Rattchuk is still at Valle Vista Home Center and still likes her job. Princess Shell and Brand Muffin are still here and I actually see them once in a while. Dave and I are still on opposite schedules, and are still trying to work THAT out...but there is a possibility that soon it will all work out cuz he MIGHT be switching jobs (cross your fingers and toes) My work is ...welll....interesting as of late. A LOT of rumors regarding a possible shut down by Hilton but my thought is"whatever is gonna happen will happen" and getting all worked up over a possibility is pretty dumb. So, I shall wait and see.

Nitoe and I have been taking cake decorating classes together once a week for the past 3 months. I have discovered that not only do I ENJOY making and decorating the cakes, I am pretty good at it. Perhaps I will make a side business out of it....

Freakin and Pufferfish are doing good. They are real happy and I am glad for them. They really do make a great couple.

Anthostein is still at school and is doing well, I suppose. I really don't hear from him that often, but when I do, he seems ok.

That is all.



(Beckatang)

HEY EVERYONE!!

Hi there....it has been a LONG time since I last blogged (at least according to Freakin') so here goes...

A few changes have happened in the past few months, one of which is that Anthostein has moved out. He decided he wants to be a chef and is now a student at The International Culinary School at the Art Institute of The Inland Empire (WOW that's a mouthful!). Anyway, he lives at the college housing. He will be there for 3 years and will have a masters degree when he finishes.

Another change is that Princess Shell and her girlfriend Sassafras have moved in. They ran into some financial difficulty and lost their apartment, and so of course we told them to come home. Couldn't have them out on the streets, after all.

My friend Freakin' is no longer single. That's right ladies...you missed out, now stop your crying! Anyway, his girlfriend has been renamed Pufferfish(yeah I changed it again...deal with it Freakin') and she has the most adorable baby girl codenamed Panda.

As of this Monday,RattChuk will be gainfully employed at Valle Vista Hardware. YAY! It's her first job and she's excited. That will pass soon enough....

Ed and I are doing ok. He is still on nights and I'm on days, so we do have THAT going for us...We have managed to take a couple of weekend trips and do try to spend as much time together as possible during the week......

That's about all I can think of for now...so good night....

ZION

As I am typing this little blog, I am sitting in a cabin in Zion, Utah. It is SO beautiful here! A little background on how I came to this place is needed, so here goes.....

My OLDER sister Sue (did I mention she was older than me? ) and 2 of her friends were going to come up here and do some hiking for like a week and then Sue decided that it would be a blast to get as many members of our family here as possible. SO..Myself, Ed, Rattchuk, Freakin, my sister Melissa, her 4 kids, my sister Beckatang, my brother John, my sister Mary and her husband and grand daughter all converged on this wonderous spot.

It has been amazing. Family fun, hiking, good food, good times, beautiful scenery (pics to come later) . But the best part for me was the chance to spend time with the brother and sisters. We don't seem to see each other as much as we would like, so it was pretty awesome!

I think everyone will agree that this was a great time, especially when John emptied his ice chest on Sue, and then spent the rest of the day/evening trying to convince her it was all Beckatanag's idea!

4th of July at the Park

The side of a very cool cake that we got for the 4th.

A watermelon cake...complete with ants for the 4th!

Ed at the park on the 4th.

Rattchuk's "tattoo"

The elusive Princess Shell at the park

Rattchuk

Freakin. He really hates having his picture taken.

Anthostein at the park

Little Bit at the park.

Conversations with Lucius

Ok, so I believe that my 4 year old grandson Lucius is quite possibly one of the funniest people that I have met in a long time. Let me recount a couple of recent conversations with him.....

On the way to the zoo Lu and I were in the back seat and I had been irritating Bug (can't help it..it's fun for me) and she had told me that I was being dumb and then I turn to Lu and say:

Me: Man. She sure is grumpy, isn't she?

Lu: Yup.

Me: I wonder why she's so grumpy , Lu?

At this point, he turns to me and says:
"Look, I'm a pretty nice guy...I have NO idea why SHE'S so grumpy."


#2
After the Zoo, we went to the Gaslamp Quarter for lunch. While we were waiting for the food, the following conversation takes place:

Me: So, Lu, what was your favorite animal at the Zoo?

Lu: Well, Grandma, I like the Zebras. OH, but we didn't go see them, now did we?

Just a bit of background...he never once mentioned wanting to see Zebras or even that he liked zebras all day at the Zoo.

#3

While in the pool with Bug, Lu had asked about playing with various pool toys, only to be told by Bug that they had either been chewed by the dogs, or were dirty and had to be cleaned first. So apparently my darling Grandson sighed and walked away from Bug and said:

"What IS this crap?"

I Love that boy!!!!






Beckatang!

Zoo Time w/The Girls

Bug on the "Sky Buckets"

Nitoe and Lucius in a moment of love.....

Lucius and a friend

On the way to the zoo

Nitoe, Bug and Lucius at the zoo....what a great day we had!

Tundra Summer

Ok, so summer is here on the Tundra and that means HEAT. We have been spending a fair amount of time at Bug's in her pool...but the heat is still pretty oppressive.

Not a whole lot going on here...as you can see by the photos..my flooring is DONE!!! YAY!! Anthostein and Ed did an AMAZING job and it looks FAB-U -LOUS!!! I really really really really loves it!

Been working a lot (even doing OT..I know, right!) and trying to help out here..so not a whole lot of fun..we did manage a quick trip to SD, and I took a trip to the SD Zoo with my favorite lebanese couple and grandson(That will be in a blog on it's own..my grandson is HILARIOUS!)..pictures to come later(saved em to the lap top and I'm too hot and lazy to mess with that now)

Freakin cut his hair and shaved his beard and now looks 12, and Shila the Wonderdog had to get 14 staples and wear a cone for 12 days cuz some rude dog decided to bite her. She's all better now, but she was unhappy for a while...and I learned that if I wrap her pills up in sandwich meat, she'll eat them just fine!

That's all for now...what's up with YOU?









Beckatang!

Pool time!

Bug at rest...


Happy Rattchuk!

Bug attacking me...not sure why...


Anthostein and Lucious

Bug and Anthostein...

FLOOR!!!!!

My floor...isn't it beautiful?

Putting in the last piece!

LAST PIECE!!!

The floor with the wall color....I loves it!

Anthostein working on my flooring...what a good son!

Hey Everybody!!!!!!

So Hello again from the Tundra! I haven't posted in awhile because, like my friend Himbo, I have been too busy! Let's see...first there was Prom, then Pass and Review(it's an ROTC thing) , then ROTC Senior Picnic, then more dress and shoe shopping (YAY), then Senior Awards night, then Graduation, then Grad Nite.....I am worn out. Good thing I took extra days off from work.

Also somewhere in there, I had a birthday, got an iPhone(Thanks Ed!) and a pair of Versace sunglasses (thanks Bug and Nitoe!) , and took our youngest(Rattchuk herself) to sign up for the Air Force Reserves. We also pretty much finished the painting and the fireplace is 95% tiled. What a busy busy girl I've been!

I will be posting pictures shortly......oh yeah...I almost forgot! I will be getting a memorial tattoo for my Mom on calf on Monday. It will be my first....

Graduation Pics

Rattchuk in her Graduation dress.

Little Bit Graduating


Rattchuk Graduating (and dancing)



Having fun before Senior Awards

Rattchuk's Prom part 2

Self portrait......aka "myspace shot"


Rattchuk and her date


Figuring out the corsage


Being silly!

Rattchuk's Prom

So, following are some of the pictures of Rattchuk's Senior Prom.

The Hair



Looking Beautiful
She had a good time, and really that's all that matters. I will be posting more pictures on part two!