A Conversation with Bug

Me:Hello. Whatcha doin?

Bug: Drivin home.

Me: Oh. So what's new with you?

Bug: Not much. So I came up with a brilliant idea that's sure to make us a lot of money.....

Me: Oh crap. What now?

Bug: Ok, lady, there's no reason to use that tone with me....ANYWAY....I have decided that we should buy a horse and run it in the Kentucky Derby.

Me: No. I am not buying a horse and putting it in the Derby.

Bug: Why the hell not? We could make a LOT of money when it wins...

Me: Ok, First of all, neither one of us has the kind of money it takes to buy a racehorse and train it, and then there's the matter of a jockey.

Bug: You can buy a horse for like 5 grand and we can always hire a midget. They are always looking for work since Willie Wonka wrapped up production. And that's only 2500 each. And like 500 bucks for the midget.......

Me: Ummm....no. Midgets are not jockeys and even if you could find a horse for 5 grand, how would you get it trained?

Bug: Well, I have noticed that Jack (her dog) really hates it when I play "Got yer Butt" (this involves Bug pinching his butt and yelling "Got yer Butt" at him....yeah I know) So I figure if we teach the horse "got yer butt" then all the midget would have to do is get on it and then yell "Got Yer Butt!!!!" and the horse would take off and WIN! Also, midgets can do anything we can do...bigot.

Me: Wow. You really need to be busier during the workday.

Bug: Your tax dollars hard at work!

Me: And I never said midgets couldn't BE jockeys, I was simply saying they aren't the same thing... Besides, where would we keep this horse?

Bug: We would take turns. One week at your house and one week at mine....you know sharing. We would also have to share the midget....but they don't take up much room....

Me: Ummmmm......no.

Bug: I even came up with a name for the horse....BrenJa!

Me: Hey, I kinda like that........a midget you say??????





(Beckatang!)